Priorities...

Priorities? What are mine? I am seriously contemplating going back to work. I am hesitating on two levels.

One: My husband is away until mid-December. Though I have an awesome support network of friends and family to call on (ie: lean on) when necessary the reality is that I am parenting 3 boys, ages 1-13 on my own. Could I maintain my sense of humour and charming disposition if I add the demands of a new job to my busy schedule.

Two: There are some big transitions coming up in the near future. (ie: moving to a new and as yet unknown city) But the move might be a long way off. Do I hold off going back to work until our life is more settled or do I (gulp) admit that this is about as settled as it is going to get for a long while?

ok, there are more than two levels that I am hesitating on...

Three: I (gulp) have a long held ambition of pursuing a career as a freelance writer/journalist. To this end I am working steadily on my English Degree and hope to pursue a more specialized education (either as a journalist or a teacher) when our life is more settled... (italics added to emphasize the irony(?) of our life being settled. Is there really such a thing as settled? What does that mean anyways? I don't know if irony is the right word but I couldn't think of a better one.) If I go back to work I would not be working in this field as I have no experience or education to qualify me for it. Well, that is not completely true. I do have some experience but not enough to get me a job that pays for food, gas, tuition and daycare which is what I need. To earn an actual paycheque I would have to return to work that I know: clerical work and/or customer service and/or retail work... I could attempt an unqualified leap into the freelance writing arena but wonder if I have the stamina and ambition necessary to be self employed. As I said to a friend the other day, "it is great to imagine being your own boss when you are planning coffee breaks, etc. The hard part comes when you actually have to get assertive and make yourself get down to work."

Four: I have not forgotten that I am mother to an incredibly charming one year old boy. I know some people in my life might balk to think that I am not 100% satisfied with my role as a stay at home mother. I love the time I spend with my son. I just think I would love that time with my son more if I knew I was not sacrificing my own personal goals to stay at home with him. I am not looking to work an intensely full time job. I'm looking for a balance. Perhaps I will spend my mornings working part time and studying part-time and leave my late afternoons and evenings free to enjoy the energy and enthusiasm of my three incredibly talented and diverse sons. That is my ideal goal. I just have to figure out how to make it work.

By the Way... (Re: Deleted Comments)

if you see deleted comments on my blog entries it is likely spam. If I get a comment that is generic and looks like an attempt to get people to log onto their website and sell them stuff, I do not check the link to that website. I delete it immediately. If I get comments from fellow bloggers that are not generic I will read them and likely check the website link before deciding whether to delete or keep the comment.
Feel free to comment. But if you are trying to sell debt repayment or college girls, I am not interested and neither are my readers.